I dunno

I'm not going mad.  On the contrary, I think I've achieved a level of super sanity.  It's all clear to me know.  I see the future, it bright....and shitty.  And I think there's a Moose.  The walls are talking to me, they tell me that I should kill Jimmy Fallon, I don't know why, but I'll take it under consideration.

THAT FUCKING TOASTER IS A RACIST!  Everyday it continues to spew it's hateful propaganda against Mexicans, Gays, and Arabs.  Nobody else can hear it, I can, because I've been there man.  I've seen it....I've seen the Fog.

I don't trust the toilet anymore.  It's ego has gotten out of control.  It claims to have a natural control over man.  It wants to own us.  That porcelain bastard doesn't see that the human spirit is stronger.  We will dig holes and shit in them with pride, no more will the sons of bitches rule out lives. 

Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight?  That's what the man in my closet has been asking me.  I don't know what it means, but I've named the man Scooter.

I see people walk around so blissfully, unaware that it's only a matter of time before the Squirrels will wipe us out, thus making way for the New Rodent Order.  Well, me and Jonathan Taylor Thomas have something to say about that.

I'm not crazy, I'm just....awake.

.....Christ, I need a life.

Not the End